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Saying a nice greeting to everyone is the best way to catch someone's attention.
If that doesn't work usually it's best to address someone with a question.
Also you can use the abbreviations previously mentioned also.
When in IRC chats there's the "/me" command to do your actions.
It depends on the person's preference of doing their actions.
Considering that this relationship maybe over a long distance the chances of you meeting the other person are almost next to none.
But don't let this stop you from keeping in contact of each other.
Usually people will keep in contact through e-mail, regular mail, and sometimes phone calls.
In IRC's you can only type in all capitals, there is no text editing.
It is another way oggetting another chatter to talk to you, but it is considered to be rude unless you have no choice to, which is usually when no matter what you have said in the chat, everyone is still ignoring you even though you have not typed anything rude or insulting.